


Come back to me

by orphan_account



Series: The Two Crowns : B Side [12]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - A Song of Ice and Fire, Angst, F/M, Gen, M/M, denial of loss
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-11
Updated: 2015-05-13
Packaged: 2018-03-30 01:18:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3917818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The letter had arrived in the trembling hands of Sou and Kenma already feared what it would read. He had not dreamt of this, and he already cursed the Gods for it. The Prince's seal shone too bright against the white paper and he felt bile against his tongue, like fire was eating at him, at his soul. Kenma feared.</p><p>Part 2 : Saeko</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Kenma.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [hicsvntdracones](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hicsvntdracones/gifts).



> A companion fic to the Chapter 6 of The Two Crowns verse by hicsvntdracones. Tells one of the aftermath of the event that happened in the chapter, with more to come.

He had felt this uneasiness, this clenching in his guts since he had woken up but Kenma knew he had not dreamt. He had chased every thought down, but nothing bar the soft and slow cold air of Tetsurou's breath on his neck ad the warm hand on his hip had been his companion for the night.

And yet, yet he was pacing back and forth in his chambers, his fists clenched tight as nothing, nothing could make sense of the fear he felt climbing up his spine, the way every breeze seemed to be too cold, freezing even through his thicker robes. His soul felt something his mind could not comprehend yet and he was scared. 

Scared beyond any relief and not even the small puff of Snow's breath on his skin could make him settle down, even for a moment. Because then, the nagging would come back as if the Gods were taunting him and Kenma could not see why. For once, he hoped a dream would come, he hoped that he would know the truth he felt creeping up in the stones and the silence of the Eerie.

Kenma whirled around upon hearing soft knocks on the wooden door, Snow alert beside him as he called out. He watched Sou enter, his reddened cheek a telltale of his shortened breath as he looked at Kenma.

« My lord » he said between two breaths «  a letter has arrived for you. » and Kenma nodded his thanks, already walking towards him as thoughts of Shouyou came to his mind, easing the dread in his core as warmth replaced it. Warmth and butterflies in his stomach, and Kenma felt happier.

« It bears the seal of Prince Tobio » Sou added, softer, as he watched Kenma stop, his outstretched arm falling along his body and he bit at his lips, watching his Lord's face fall.

His Grace had written him, and Kenma could not fathom why. Would not fathom why, as the fear came back twofold, as the dread made his hand shake at his sides and Snow at his side purred too loud, butting his head as Kenma stayed silent, wondering, worrying.

« Read it to me Sou » he said instead, in a whisper, as if to not rouse Fate from her bed. As not to provoke her and he saw the worry on Sou's face grow even more. 

He showed a chair for Sou to sit on as he stayed standing, as he tried to stay strong as Sou broke the seal and the frown that marred the youngster's face made him worry immediately.

« What ? » he rasped out, licking his lips to quench the dryness of his throat.

« His Grace's handwriting seems hurried. Frantic. » he answered back as he began to read the first words. Mindless salutations Sou read too quickly and Kenma wanted to hurry him, to make him finish these dreaded words to ease his worry.

The Prince could not have written to him but for his dreams and Kenma doubted he had taken too kindly to his inquiry. He had not expected an answer this soon, if ever and the grim line of Sou's face told him it was not about this. Not about the mindless chatter of a Prince, a boy lost in his gift, in the curse of the greendream. 

Kenma had not realized he was not paying attention to Sou's calm voice until he heard him gasp. Loudly, as if all the air in the Kingdoms disappeared and the young boy was dying in this very room. He looked up to see him pale as a sheet, his fingers white against the brittle paper and Kenma felt himself shiver in fear, shiver as if The Stranger had caressed his skin intimately.

« Tell me. By the Gods Sou, speak ! » he ordered, voice too loud as he walked towards him, ready to snap the paper off his hands.

« Shouyou » the boy said, almost inaudibly and Kenma stopped « Shouyou has been taken in the Arbor, and in a breath he added, by the Ironborns. » 

And Kenma felt his world crumble beneath his feet as a sob, too heavy, too hurtful came from deep within.

« .. What » he said as he felt his strength leave, falling down to his knees by Sou's side, hands trembling on his thighs.

« An attack, a raid to take the Prince but Shouyou was taken away instead. They do not know if he is alive, they know nothing and his Grace begs pardon for such news »

But Shouyou has been taken and Kenma could not care less about the Prince's excuses. He felt cold engulf him until he could not hear anything but for his own sobs, the blood ringing too loud in his mind and Kenma cursed himself.

How could he not have dreamt about such a thing ? About Shouyou, his Sun in these forsaken lands, being taken. About the Prince being attacked. How could he have not ? He had dreamt for so many nights but the Gods denied him the gift to save a life, to save a love he cherished so much within himself. He looked up between two heavy breaths to see Sou crying, sobbing against the smudged writing but Kenma could not reach him, could not comfort him even if he knew the boy hurt too.

Shouyou was gone, away, and even the Prince begged for a forgiveness Kenma could not even give to himself.

Kenma moved when he felt arms against him, a strength he did not posses anymore around him and Kenma only cried harder against the chest pressed against his ear. The hands on his hair too strong, too calloused and he wanted to scream until his throat was bleeding.

« What has happened my love ?  Have you dreamt ? » he heard Tetsurou say against his forehead and he found the force to fight against the embrace, bristling with guilt and anger and sorrow at the words.

« I did not » he said between sobs, fists tight against the fabric of the robe and he did not recognize his voice. Hollow. Empty. Hurting, and Kenma hated himself more for this. He was not the one gone, he was not Shouyou.

« Shouyou was taken » the sniffling Sou said instead, and Kenma heard the paper being given to Tetsurou.

« I did not dream » he repeated, almost hitting Tetsurou as he read the letter himself and Kenma cried harder, finding it difficult to breathe, to live even as his world was hanging to the body he felt pressed against.

The Gods are too cruel, he wanted to scream. He dreamt of the Lords Defiant coming with sharp blades and hateful words to their chambers, he dreamt of the Prince down South and of many things get he would rather for but they refused his helping Shouyou, his helping his tender and sweet love. And he wanted to curse them all, to curse the insight they gave him for at this moment, it was nothing.

« I could not help » he repeated weakly against Tetsurou's chest, between heavy breaths as Tetsurou rocked him, a tender hand in his hair but Kenma could not care about this. 

He could not care, for he feared now to dream about his death. To see love die in front of his eyes and to wake up in a world Shouyou did not live in anymore. His Grace could be forsaken for all he cared, for Shouyou was too precious for him and the Ironborn took him. 

And if he had begged to even dream a glimpse of Shouyou as Sou read this forsaken latter, now Kenma begged the Gods to let him be dreamless until he knew for sure Shouyou was alive.

Because he knew then, that even Tetsurou's strength will not help him stand again, and he would fall like his father did.

And in the midst of it all, he realized that Tetsurou's hands felt too big, too rough, too intimate to be what he wished for, and yet Kenma reached out, never minding Sou's gasp as he kissed his Lord forcefully, blinded by tears and short of breath, keening, wailing as Tetsurou deepened the kiss, the hands at his hips too strong. 

He could feel his own tremors as Tetsurou lifted him up, hands secured under his thighs and Kenma could not calm down. Not even with the softer kisses against his skin as he sought out something more brutal, something entirely else than Tetsurou's love.

« Make me forget, by the Gods, make me forget » he said, voice hoarse as he still did not look at him, feeling the furs of his bed against his back and Tetsurou already spreading his legs apart.

He met no resistance, and Kenma hurried him up, looking away when Tetsurou would lean down for a kiss, chest heaving with sobs and barely pleasure as he kissed his skin and his breasts.

And it was not his Lord's name he wanted to scream in anguish, in pleasure both. Kenma wished he had dreamt it all, but he could at least dream of red hair and softer hands on his body.


	2. Saeko

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She rode as if the Stranger was behind her, lungs filled ith air and fear for her brother's life. She left everything behind her to ride at once, and she dreaded to stop, to learn he had died. To learn she was not fast enough to tell him to fight once again, to be strong. Stronger than her, for she felt her world crumble and fall with each step her mare took.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second part of the serie, with Saeko. Parts of Tanaka's background is revealed. I hope you like it!

The small note had arrived attached to a raven's foot and Saeko had frowned upon seeing the exhausted bird. The evening had been calm and there was still no news about anything happening but the beast had looked at her with beady eyes and tired wings that seemed to shake the world underneath her feet. 

She swore to herself not to shake as she detached the paper from the raven, letting it hop on the rail of the balcony for a while before setting into the sky again. She tried then. Not to think about what the small paper could read to her, not to already fear what she did not want to see but she found herself to be paralyzed.   
She looked up only to see Akiteru looking at her, a worried frown on his face she easily smoothed out with her thumb, a smile even she felt wrong on her lips.

« It cannot be much » she said with a laugh that seemed to tear her throat apart « It is from Noya. Maybe Ryuu successfully killed himself trying to impress this Second Prince of his »

But only the softness of Akiteru's hand on her arm prevented the quiver in her hands as she opened the note, willing the world to stop turning until her breathing came right, until her head felt like being on her shoulders again. 

She wanted to laugh, seeing Nishinoya's small handwriting but Saeko did not realize that the strangled sounds, between laughter and sob came from her as she saw the dry blood on the white paper, as she read the dreaded words.

Come Saeko please, it read. Come to the Citadel. Ryuu has been hurt in a trap set by the Ironborns and even the Maesters do not know if he will survive the week. I beg of you please come.

And Saeko's world crumbled as quickly as she read the note, the ink disappearing in what looked like tears and she could not know if they were Nishinoya's or her own. She felt her vision blur and Akiteru's hold on her tighten but she could not do anything but fall.

Ryuunosuke was hurt. Her blood, her gift was hurt and not even the Maesters at the Citadel could tell if he would survive. It felt like nothing was holding her in this present, like the Gods kept their thunder against her and Saeko hated it.  
Hated it even more for Akiteru to see her like this, to thumb at her wet cheeks and look at her in worry. Not the one she knew during her pregnancies, but worry etched so far it made her cry even more.

She let him pry away the note from her numb fingers, clenching them against air, against her own chest as she tried to calm herself down, to calm the waves of despair and grief and anger.

« Saeko. » he had said, his voice ever the soft, his hands against her jaws. « Ride to him. Ride as fast as you can - »

« I cannot » she answered, breath harsh and quick, looking at Akiteru's eyes and neck and the sky too. «  I cannot leave you all like this, our youngest needs me.

« Your brother needs you and I know by the Gods how much you love him » he said, voice soft yet harsh and she felt his breath hot against her skin. 

You need him, they both heard the air sing.

« Ride my love, the Citadel, Ryuunosuke awaits you. The Stranger cannot face two from Hellholt like you, and you brother will fight even more. Come back to us with a smile and tell stories from the Maesters » he added, whispering against her brow, his words calming her down and making her blood boil.

He may not live through the week, Akiteru had repeated, breaking at the end as if he was seeing his own brother in the letter, and Saeko had risen, her face still ashen but the set of her brows made him smile grimly.

They all could wait for her to return, and none of their children will miss their mother if it meant that Ryuunosuke lived or that she paid her last respect to him. And he prayed to all Gods that they would never see such an end for he knew nothing would stop Saeko to seek revenge for her brother, for who she called her gift even when speaking to him.

 

The trip North had been a nightmare, Saeko forcing her horse to go as quick as possible, stopping at no time but to drink and eat by the moonless sky. She felt like the Stranger rode at her side, that He pursued the same goal as she did and she prayed that her Dornish mare will truly be the quickest.   
She would have cast no glance to the King's men or any bandit, only the thought of her brother seemed to control her step and path.

The Citadel was drawing near and Saeko allowed herself to breath out and pat her mare's neck, whispering encouragement she did not know if they were for the mare or herself as she passed through the streets, the twilight sky as only witness.   
She felt her hands quivers around the reins, burning and bleeding from how much and how strong she had held them but nothing would pry them out of her grasp until she set foot on the first step of the building.

She had heard many stories about this place, and some of them from Akiteru himself and even Takeda ; but she did not care.She saw nothing but the small figure up the steps, robe red as blood and hair dark as night.

« Noya » she called out with a strong voice, watching the figure turn towards her quickly.

She met them halfway through, her hands on their cheeks, watching them flinch away from the raw flesh but she did not car.

« My brother » she repeated twice, voice breaking at each time. « tell me he lives. » 

Saeko searched for the smallest of signs that would mean she was too late, that Ryuu had not survived the day, but she only found the warmth of Noya's hands on her, their eyes eerie as before but for the strong set of their brow.

« He lives still » they say, barely above a whisper «  but  but I could not do more and the Maesters still fear his strong fever and his dreams. »

Saeko heard no more as she pulled them for a tight hug, not caring about the press of Noya's head against her breasts, not caring about hearing them cry against her skin.

Ryuu lived, and she cried too. 

« You did more than any one else did » she whispered against their hair « I owe you his life, I owe my sanity and so much more. Even if the Maesters were the one to finish, you saved him. You saved my gift. » and it's only then that she felt their hands against her waist, tight against the fabric of her cloak but she knew it was from relief.

« The Maesters still aren't sure about his fate Saeko » they said after, voice clearer but cheeks reddened by their sobs. «  We don't know, and we all pray for his life. »

« Ryuu will be fine » she swore, repeating it in her head, until her soul and heart believed it too. «  And if the Stranger takes hold of him again, I'll scare Him away, and my brother with it. »

He can only be fine, she thought. With me here, with you there and everyone else, he does not needs prayers to live through. His own strength and seeing your faces will take care of this.

« Take me to him » she said after a silence and grabbed Noya's hands tightly when he looked at her.

« Your hands » they said with a frown.

« Take me to Ryuu, these burns are nothing. » she repeated and Noya only nodded, their hand still in hers as they stepped into the Citadel. 

She followed him silently, finally watching the stony walls and the chill of the air in the Citadel, and everything reminded her of what was waiting for her at the end.

« Princess Yui went with me» Nishinoya said after a while, not looking at Saeko even as she nodded. « I  the sight is not beautiful » they added in a breath.

« Trust me Noya » she answered with a grim face «  I saw my brother in worse states that you can think of. Whatever ironborn did this cannot be worse than the Hound himself »

But her hand stilled on the doorknob, her body frozen before she even pushed the door. She knew what to wait for.  
But anything would be better than to see the corpse of her brother, or she thought.

 

As she entered the small room, she thought otherwise. 

« Oh Ryuu » she whispered in a breath, not even stepping to get close to her brother.

She could feel and smell every of his wounds and her heart bled for him. This was not Ryuunosuke. He laid there, too still on the small cot and the bandages still bore the red of his blood. Pale, so pale and Saeko hurt as if she was the one dying in this little room. 

She did not mind the smell of blood, of wounds and of hurt, for she already knew it yet she brought a hand to her mouth, trying not to upset her stomach with the overwhelming scent. Her brother made a poor sight indeed, and the beads of sweat she could see on his forehead made her worry. Wounds were easy to heal, but not their fever. 

She went to kneel by the bed, kissing Ryuunosuke's forehead with a kiss, her hand on his chest trying to measure the slow beat of his heart, feeling him to be alive in front of her for everything seemed like a dream. 

Her fingers met soft leather and she opened her eyes again, looking down to see the worn out necklace upon his chest and she could not help but smile.

« Did you put it back ? » she asked, never leaving her gaze from Ryuunosuke. She knew Noya was watching, they always did when it came to her brother.

« The Maesters wanted to throw it away, said it could only bring sickness with how coated with blood it was. » she heard the same scoff in their voice as in hers at these words.

She knew that Ryuunosuke would have despised them all, her included if he could not find the leather around his neck upon waking, fevered mind or not. He hold onto it like a promise to himself and to the Gods and Saeko herself could not see him without it.

She caressed his cheeks once again, softly sighing as she got up again.

« We should leave, I am sure he will not move until I eat and drink. Then we will see. » she said, adding the last words to herself with a last glance to her brother as she followed Noya's steps out of the room. 

She hoped to hear him soon, to see him awake and fully himself before the month ended, or else she would truly believe the Stranger had taken hold upon him And the Gods heard her prayers weeks too soon.

 

« Shoyou ? » a voice rang, shaky, breathless as they went to close the door behind them. As Saeko stopped the door from closing, they heard a ruffling sound and Ryuunosuke grunting in pain. 

She looked at Noya then, watching them shake their head, gesturing for her to enter the room instead.

« Brother » she called out, a bit too firmly as she watched him struggle with the sheets, trying to rise from his cot.

« Where's Shoyou ? We need to find him, now ! » he said again, hands quivering around the sheets, breath too heavy to be normal and Saeko half expected him to be asleep, to be dreaming. But Ryuunosuke was there, propped up on his elbows, eyes gleaming with fever and madness as he looked around the room, breathing made heavier by the seconds as he could not process where he was.

When the sight of Shoyou being taken away, the sight of this man with white hair and his blade against his gut plagued his mind.

« Brother ! » Saeko called out, reaching out for to steady him as she forced him to look at her, to see reason. « You are in the Citadel right now, do not try to get up. »

« We need to find him » he continued, almost keening as he fought against Saeko's hands and she was afraid never to recognize her brother in these fevered eyes and the way he coughed till blood was drawn from his wounds.

« You cannot Ryuu » she whispered instead, hands as claws on his arms, forcing him to look at her, forcing him down to reality « You are dead on your feet, and even Noya has no words about him yet. Care for your life and ride then if you desire but please, do not make me lose you even for the boy »

She saw him protest still, eyes darting around and she gasped as she saw them roll into his skull, her brother limp in her arms and blood reddening the bandages on his stomach and hand. She called out for him a few times, trying to rouse him but nothing, not even Noya's voice made him move. Saeko did not hear herself scream, yell at her brother to come back until the cold, wrinkled hand of a Maester pushed her aside from the tiny room.

You can do nothing but wait, he had said, his long white beard tucked inside his chains and Saeko had wanted to throttle him, to make the boil of her blood stop and the voices in her mind whispering about death go away. 

But she waited. Pacing around the walls without seeing anything, scowling at the apprentice healing her hands, inquiring without pause about her brother but nothing changed. Not even with the kind words of the Princess, the reassurances and whispered « nedys » of Noya's that made her hurt.

Fever was the greatest enemy and Saeko always feared to see the shadow of Death beside her brother each time she entered the room and saw him silent and still.

« He has stopped dreaming at least » Noya told her after a few days, coming to give her a cup of wine as they stood beneath a starless sky. « They say they could hear him scream in all the rooms, about blood, about blades and a single name his voice always broke when uttered. They say they never heard someone call out for a dead man this much. »

She could feel the weight of their stare as she drank her wine, thirsty for something that would erase these words, erase the memories it sprang out.

« They say, but you heard » she almost snarled inter her cup

« I thought he dreamt of the Prince the first time » Noya admitted, and Saeko could not determine where they were anymore but for the sound of their voice. « But it was « Taichi » and no other name, even if I often heard Koushi's name between his screams and mumbles»

« I cannot tell you what is not mine to tell, even to someone like you » she said, hushed words into the moon. « But he was the one bearing the necklace first, and Ryuu is haunted by his death. By many others. Maybe by Shoyou's too, and many to come. The raiders were his family, as you may know, but they were his demise too. Fights, wounds and death far greater than the love and laughter we shared with them. »

And she pitied him to see them in his dreams, to live this in his sickness when he could not even fight for his own life.  
She could still see the blade of the Hound and the rugged scar on her brother's stomach whenever she looked at him here. The sands of Dorne in her mind and his screams as she sewed him back up time and time again.

She winced looking at her empty cup, wishing everything to go away, wishing the Sun will bring a new day to them, and rest to her brother.

 

But the morn Sun came and the Maesters still shook their head, days after days upon watching over her brother and Saeko took to go from the Citadel, to ride for hours to clean her mind, not to hope too much, not to despair either. But she found it more difficult as the days passed and even her hand stilled around her quill as she wrote back to Hellholt.

She would not go till she saw him awake or dead, she had promised to herself but she always dreaded to come to his chambers, to see the Maester's grim face turned pitiful. Saeko was ready to break anytime soon, and even this day, her breath came with sobs before entering the room.

But no corpse greeted her, only a gasp and a laugh as she looked up tiredly to see the mirth in her brother's eyes despite the tiredness inked in his face. 

« By the look on your face, one would have expected me to be dead » he had said and Saeko looked at him, stared for what seemed like ages until Ryuunosuke coughed and squirmed under her gaze as if he was still the boy who stole at her side.

And Saeko laughed. Nervously, a full bellied laugh of happiness she did not know anymore but she felt like the worries of the Kingdoms did not matter anymore for she stood in front of her brother alive and still cheeky as he ever was.

« You should laid down, you could give the Northeners a scare with how pale you look » Saeko said with a soft, saddened smile as she pushed Ryuu to lay down on the cot. She touched his face with soft fingers, her face set in grimness as she looked at the wounds on his chest, at his bandages hand and it's only the feel of his calloused fingers on her wrist that made her stop.

They did not need more words, not even to reassure themselves that the other was here and she was thankful to his never asking questions as to why was she there. It could wait another day, for they had many to come.  
Yet, she still felt her throat tighten, watching with worry as Ryuu moved slowly, breathed slowly, as if still hanging to life by a thing rope, and she hated this feeling.

« What troubles you ? » he asked when the silence stretched too thin, voice too hoarse and tired but they both laughed when he gestured at himself with a shaky hand and a shrug. Beyond all of this, it says, beyond the grief I can see on you face.

He always knew, Saeko thought wryly. Dornishmen could say whatever they wanted about the Hellholt bastard yet he saw more than anyone did, and she hated him for this.

« I fear Dorne will not protect you » she said instead, lips against is forehead, for no one was to hear this but them. Whispers of siblings in the dead of nights like they always have done. « That the court will break even your courage and strength, she added forcefully as she felt his hand tighten around hers. You love too quick and too big brother, and I dread to see the day these ungrateful lords break your heart in too many pieces. »

That I will see you dead, she thought to herself with bitterness. Even more so than when you were bleeding on that cot with fevered dreams and a single name on your lips. They do not deserve he gift you are, she wanted to scream to him and to the Crowned Princes themselves.  
That you got too close to the Stranger for my own sanity, and I have no one to blame but your bravery. But she stayed quiet instead, eyes closed as she breathed in, as she listened to Ryuu's beating heart.

« I vowed myself to them » she heard him say, voice stronger. « And I will not stop fighting for them. For Koushi, who saved my life when Taichi died ; for Chikara. For everyone who needs my strength and you know it sister. Only the Stranger can stop me from doing so. »

Saeko punched him then, swift fingers between his ribs to make him grunt. To hide her fear, to hide the truth of his words in her own mind. She knew it, as she knew he would bare the raider's fate into his own hands, that nothing but death would stop him.  
Not even the Prince's words would make him stop and Saeko feared he would destroy himself protecting him, all of them in their ivory towers of courtly life. 

« If you are strong enough to tell such stupid things » she said instead, her grin being reflected on her brother's face « you're strong enough to face Nishinoya's and the Princess's worry right ? »

Oh, by the Gods, she was ever so pleased to see him groan at this, coughing in pain as he did so. Some may say she could be harsh with him, but she knew her brother. She knew he would not like the Princess gentle smiles and words when she did not know of his nightmares, of his worries. She knew he would break in Noya's arms, and how he would hate this the moment his tears would dry. 

There were many things to know about him and she doubted that anyone in their sandy capital knew it all.

« You're not alone in this » she softly said, fingers brushing along his bandages to rest against the leather jewel. 

She watched his face soften and his eyelids close but his heart beat calmly, relaxed against her hand.

« I never was, wasn't I ? » came the only answer before Saeko rose to let him sleep. 

She could go back to her own home and calm the mind of her family. To say that the Hellholt bastard still stood, strong as ever and she could not wait to write to him about the shouts of happiness of her children and the soft smile on Akiteru's face. 

She had many days to spend here still, but the Sun had brought what little happiness she asked for, and the Gods still stood over the gift they made to her.

Her brother stood, and she felt her soul come at peace ; the ghosts of the past and future gone from her mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the next one to come is Ennoshita's part, probably, where it all comes to an end before the next chapters of The Two Crowns come out.


End file.
